by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio.
NEW YORK, NY - Wow! As a result of pure prop professionalism, the propmaster at Broadway’s Shucked has found pieces of prop corn in the show’s prop stool.
“My job is to help flesh out and color the world of the show, and in this world, there’s definitely corn in their poopy - so much so that it makes it into the opening number,” noted propmaster Olivia Harrold, using a set of stainless steel culinary tongs to add little yellow studs to a pile of healthy excrement. “You don’t ever actually see the stool in the show, but I like to think the audience takes comfort just knowing it’s there.”
Audience member Ricky Cullerd can confirm that the vilely realistic sample does indeed add to the experience. “The show has everything: whipfast jokes, heartwarming songs, and the underlying implication that not everything these people are eating is digesting properly,” claimed Cullerd while stagedooring to get his toilet paper signed by the props department. “You get the feeling there’s even corn on the inside part of the poop, where people don’t see it. You know, like, inside the poop? The core? There’s definitely corn in there. That’s dedication.”
However, not everyone associated with the Tony-winning musical share the same enthusiasm for authenticity. “Every time I try to use a bathroom, these prop sickos are using the toilet to see if their corn-encrusted logs float, for ‘realism’. It’s fucking disgusting,” notes a cast member who has asked to remain anonymous, for fear of being labeled a Little-Pieces-Of-Corn-In-Poop Denier. “Corn actually gives me a belly ache. You don’t see me doubled over going ‘owwy owwy’ during each performance, do you? So why do I have to constantly wipe prop poop off my shoes in the dressing room? Wait, what do you mean they didn’t put any prop poop in the dressing room?”
At press time, the same team was experimenting on new props for an upcoming production of Urinetown by peeing all over New York City. Their court date is currently set for October 7th.