by Jonathan Hogue. @jthogue2.
NEW YORK, NY - Ripley-Grier Studios was buzzing with excitement Friday morning as hundreds of out-of-work film and television actors flooded the hallways for regional EPA auditions following SAG-AFTRA’s strike announcement. One currently-unemployed SAG member - an actress with over fifty years in the industry - was seen performing vocal exercises behind a faux palm in the tropical-themed lobby, in preparation for Showboat Dinner Theatre’s Mamma Mia! open call.
“You know, I did the film of Mamma Mia! back in the day, and I just had so much fun. So I figure: why not let this old gal run her toes through the sand one more time?” said the actress, accidentally pulling an Oscar out of her bag while searching for her MAC lipstick. “Besides, that bitch Tyne Daly already took my role in Doubt.”
According to casting associates, the unidentified actress was reported to have sung sixteen bars of “Islands in the Stream” followed by a monologue from Sophie’s Choice, and was immediately offered the role of Donna.
Ultimately, she turned down the role after learning the Florida-based theatre’s communal company housing only offers bunk beds, but was seen shortly after strapping on Laducas for the Mamma Mia! dance call at Bristol Riverside.