by Danielle Koenig. Instagram: @danielle_koenig.
BROOKLYN, NY. - A group of white liberals living in Bedstuy announced today that, despite not enjoying Michael R. Jackson’s Pulitzer-Prize-winning musical A Strange Loop, they’re "sad it's closing" and are “still really glad it was made.”
“It’s obviously a triumph of contemporary American Theatre”, remarked Katelyn Wright, who recently sang "Waiting For Life" at her Ithaca College BFA showcase. “Thoughtful theatre should make people uncomfortable! I just wasn’t comfortable with how uncomfortable I was. Nowadays everyone’s always talking about the ‘big, black, and queer ass American Broadway', but what about the ‘petite, white, and straight-but-would-kiss-a-girl-when-she’s-drunk American Broadway’?”
Caitlin Ryte, who still has a black square on her Instagram, claimed to have a greater understanding of the piece thanks to her background.
“I’m Italian, so I know discrimination,” declared Ryte while smoking a cigar-flavored Juul. “When I go into a casting room, they’re only considering me for that one guy in A Bronx Tale, or a featured graffiti dancer in In The Heights. And it’s not like I didn’t love the show because I didn’t get it. I just wish they had done the same thing but in a more relatable way - with at least one white person of color. Like Ariana Grande!”
Qaetlynne Raight, the self-proclaimed Peggy Schuyler of the group, also expressed her disinterest.
“There's a real opportunity here to mine something more out of the line ‘I am a Disney usher’,” offered Raight while wearing a ‘Black Lives Matter’ shirt with Mickey Mouse ears over the ‘i’ in ‘Lives’. “Disney approaches heavy subject matter in a fun and friendly way all the time and succeeds. I think Frozen is just as powerful as A Strange Loop - maybe even more so! Because there’s a deep struggle about identity, but more importantly, there’s a dancing snowman! Hopefully its closing will make room on Broadway for more groundbreaking pieces of art from Disney Theatricals.”
When asked about how they might improve the Tony-Award winning piece, Katelyn, Caitlin, and Qaetlynne were quick to insist it should be closer to something like Suffs, Six, or Between the Lines.