by Devin Wallace. @thedevinwallace.
NEW YORK, NY - Broadway Week is back in full force, with countless two-for-one ticket deals on dozens of Broadway favorites that will show how financially out-of-reach even the cheapest tickets are for you.
“Broadway Week allows fans the opportunity to find out how nearly-impossible it can be to afford Broadway tickets,” said Broadway League President Jan Grint, pushing a wheelbarrow overflowing with gold coins from Eugene O’Neill Theater. “So many kids grow up dreaming of seeing a Broadway performance, but sadly so few can experience the soul-crushing cost and disappointment that comes with being priced out of a Broadway performance.”
Lacey Feldman, an aspiring actor in Brooklyn, was thankful for the different options Broadway Week gives to see her dwindling financial prospects.
“I immediately tried to buy a pair of orchestra tickets to Hadestown and I got a text from TD Bank that was just the word NOPE,” said Feldman while clicking an ad to sell her plasma. “But Broadway Week has really great deals on less-desirable seats too, so I luckily had the chance to find out I also can’t afford standing room-only tickets to Hadestown. When I tried to buy those, TD Bank sent me thousands of copies of my over-drafted bank statement through the mail slot like Harry Potter. Thanks Broadway Week?”
Other Broadway fans recounted how they look forward to Broadway Week every year.
“Broadway Week is like my Christmas,” said Fran Wappinger, tearing up at the idea of discounted balcony tickets for Chicago. “It allows me, for a brief moment, to forget everything happening to me in real life and transports me to a world of endless possibility, where I could chart my own destiny or snag two obstructed view mezzanine tickets for Some Like It Hot. That’s what they call the magic of the theater.”
For those who can afford tickets, Broadway Week provides an even greater chance to be booted from the website checkout a half-dozen times before giving up and renting Rock of Ages on Amazon Prime.