by Anna Larranaga. @annalarranaga.
LOS ANGELES - Well, this is a curveball. Composer Burt Bacharach, of the 1968 musical Promises, Promises, held a press conference today revealing that the Act One finale "Turkey Lurkey Time" is actually about Independence Day.
“In my version of the script, before they had ol’ Neily Simon take over, they’re sitting around the office holiday party and the boss man asks ‘how about somebody sing me a song?’,” explained Bacharach to a single angry Broadway Beat reporter who missed a barbecue for this. “And then Chuck says ‘well there aren’t any songs for this time of year!’ because back in the 60s there weren’t Christmas songs. Then one of the secretaries says ‘well how about we sing a song about the good ol’ US of A for our boys overseas!’ and then there was a big long moment of silence for Vietnam. Then the orchestra would come in and they’d reveal that the time was, indeed, turkey lurkey.”
The song, despite its Christmas lyrics and the fact that it appears in the show during an office Christmas party, is often shared on social media around Thanksgiving due to its turkey theme.
When asked how a song that mentions snow, mistletoe, and a partridge in a pear tree could possibly be about the Fourth of July, the music legend pounded his fists against the podium.
“It’s called a metaphor, ever heard of it?” exclaimed Bacharach through exasperated tears. “Tom Turkey is Thomas Jefferson, Christmas is the spirit of freedom, loosey goosey is state’s rights, and the partridge in a pear tree is the Louisiana Purchase. Is that so hard?”
At press time Lin-Manuel Miranda released a statement revealing that "Wait For It" from Hamilton is actually about the McRib.