OPINION: Mrs. Harkens Hasn't Done ADDAMS FAMILY in Four Years So Don't Rule it Out as Spring Musical
by Andrew Child. Instagram: @andrewchil6. Twitter: @DrewChild96.
LEXINGHAM, MA- As a senior who has performed in three spring musicals thus far, I feel it my duty to remind my future castmates that Harkens has not done The Addams Family during our time at East Lexingham High, and there is no reason she won’t do it again. As rumors run rampant through the school and excitement intensifies, I aim to shed a cold, hard light on a reality that may be difficult to face:
Guys, we’re probably gonna end up doing The Addams Family.
Three years ago when I brought the house down as an added fourth Wickersham Brother in Seussical (as a freshman, mind you), was I dreaming of playing an old, creepy uncle my senior year? I can’t say I was, but I am just being realistic. I’m debating shaving my head now so I’ve made peace with my face shape in time for the show.
When asked to comment on the Addams speculations, Harkens was quick to play coy.
“I’m not telling you what the musical is, but Addams Family is a fun ensemble show that families love. We’re not doing Ride the Cyclone. Are you the one who keeps sending perusal copies to my house? How did you get my address?”
Once we begin to chip away at Harkens’ cavalier selection process it becomes easier to justify reviving a musical that didn’t even last long enough on Broadway for them to stunt-cast Elvira.
No one should groan more than me. I know I could deliver a "Noel’s Lament" unlike anything seen before in Lexingham drama’s history, but I’m prepared to nobly settle for a "Moon and Me" that garners a few pithy chuckles. So too should you lower your expectations and prepare to play an ancestor, hoping your grandma will find the rigor mortis dance break cute.
The Addams Family may not be the credit we need to bolster our Tisch applications, but it’s a reality we must face, and it’s easier to face it if we are honest with ourselves and recognize that - at the very least - it's not Mamma Mia! again.