• Broadway Beat

“Whatever,” says Guy Working Door at the August Wilson

by Conor Moroney. @conorseamusactor.

NEW YORK, NY - In response to today's announcement that Lea Michele will take over the role of Fanny Brice in the revival of Funny Girl, veteran stage door attendant Angelo Sirico of the August Wilson was quoted as simply saying “whatever" in response to the bombshell news.


“Look, these things happen, but I have two kids and a water heater that's giving me trouble. This casting does not concern me,'' Sirico said, diligently checking everyone who passed by the door, as that is the job he's been hired to perform. “Miss Feldstein’s a good kid and I wish her all the best. Now if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go through all these packages and messages from people calling themselves 'Gleeks'. I don’t know what that is, but I’m assuming it’s a terrorist organization.”


When asked for further comment, Sirico couldn’t be reached, due to his union-mandated lunch break. It was reported that as long as he has his gabagool provolone hero, no one would be raining on his parade.