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  • Writer's pictureBroadway Beat

“When Are We Getting a PHANTOM OF THE OPERA Revival?” asks Mysterious, Cloaked, Andrew-Lloyd-Webber-Shaped Figure

by Nat Hrvatin. @NatHrvatin.

NEW YORK - Several sources have reported seeing a mysterious figure lurking under The Majestic Theatre’s marquee, wondering aloud about a revival of The Phantom of the Opera. Clad in the Phantom’s signature black cape, the figure bears the exact height, voice, and overall shape of Andrew Lloyd Webber. 

“I can assure you that Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber is far too busy to galavant around The Majestic,” stated Webber’s assistant, Janine Miller, as she did a sound check for a keyboard’s organ preset. “Though, he appreciates the efforts of this masked lookalike. In fact, my employer feels that anyone who doesn’t go to this sort of effort isn’t a true fan at all.” 

Cast and crew of Spamalot at the nearby St. James Theatre shared sightings of this elusive, costumed, Andrew Lloyd Webber stencil carrying a monkey music box and humming "Masquerade."

“At first, he struck up conversations with our audience members saying, ‘Spamalot was good - but it’s not The Phantom of the Opera!’” said run crew member, Anna Dorsey, as she taped a "NO ANDREW LLOYD WEBBERS" sign on the stage door. “Now, he’s actively poaching our audience, offering free serenades to anyone willing to sign his petition.”  

Broadway producer Cameron Mackintosh denied knowledge of the petition to return The Phantom of the Opera back to the stage. However, he did provide his thoughts on this new Phantom buzz.

“Myself - and my accountant - are looking forward to the glorious day when that famous chandelier relights The Majestic,” Mackintosh commented as he donned Christine Daaé’s white robe, stepping into a gondola in the middle of West 44th Street. “Though, I’m perfectly fine with sitting idly by as I wait for an uprising of Phantom fans. Then, I’ll triple the ticket prices for a scaled-down revival.”

In response, a TikTok account with the username @NotTheRealALW attempted to further influence the public. The creator - an unknown person who uncannily possesses the exact silhouette of world-renowned composer and musical theatre powerhouse Andrew Lloyd Webber - offered a reward to anyone able to convince The Shubert Organization to revive Phantom

The reward? A private appearance from an Andrew-Lloyd-Webber-shaped vocal coach who will provide singing lessons from behind the winner’s mirror.


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