“Just Cause It's Optional Doesn’t Mean It's, Like, Weird to Wear a Mask Now, Right?” asks Local Man
by Steven Verdile. @stevenverdilecreative.
NEW YORK, NY - The Broadway League announced today it is updating its mask-mandate to a mask-optional policy beginning July 1st, and theatregoers everywhere are wondering how this change will unfold. One man who spoke to us prefers to wear a mask, but was concerned he might stand out more now.
“Masks? Oh I love them. But now with this policy change, will I look like a weirdo in my shimmering white half-cracked face shield?” asked the man in his haunting voice. “I’ve felt more comfortable wearing a mask in the theater for decades, and it took awhile to catch on, so I was really pumped when they finally became popular. Seeing this new policy reversal has me bummed... and I’m already a pretty sad guy as it is.”
The whiny man also seemed to have an affinity for wearing ghoulish black capes, but the Broadway League has always had a cape-optional policy.
Th man quickly stormed away from us, saying he needed to go plead his case to revive the mandate.
“I'll go write an angry letter - that always seems to work.”