"City Center Put Their Whole Cussy Into This Year," Tweets Man Hoping to Enter the Kingdom of God
by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio.
NEW YORK, NY - Local theatre fan Nick Welsher unabashedly tweeted "city center put their whole cussy into this year" today, despite the fact that he one day hopes to be welcomed with open arms into the Kingdom of God.
"First Into The Woods, and now Parade? City Center is turning my Cussy out," he replied to himself, apparently forgetting that this life is but a test to decide whether we're worthy of eternal bliss. "I can't wait to see Ben Platt and Micaela Diamond put their whole Parussy into that show," he added, honestly getting kind of exhausting, even by mortal standards.
At press time, Welsher was seen yassifying an image of Sara Bareilles in Into The Woods - a move which has left Satan pleading with the universe to not send the man to Hell either, on the basis of the fact that Satan "just can't."