• Broadway Beat

Another "Evita" Revival? My Argentinian Neighbor Keeps Yelling at Everyone From Her Fire Escape

by HaleyJane Rose. @haleyisfamous.

NEW YORK, NY - Critics and theatre-goers alike are buzzing after yet another Evita revival has opened in New York, this time as an immersive production featuring my  Argentinian-American neighbor, Mrs. Cabrera, who just won’t stop screaming at people from her Hell's Kitchen fire escape.


“From Oklahoma! to the West Side Story revival, fans want grittier takes on musical theatre classics,” explains theatre critic, Percy Lionel. “This production breaks barriers by taking place on a fire escape nowhere near a theatre, not selling tickets, and possibly not being a production of Evita at all! We’re honestly not sure. Bravissimo!”


The production first caught people’s attention when my neighbor was seen passionately screaming at passersby from the 5th floor of the walkup apartment she’s lived in for 40 years. From there, it’s a non-stop whirlwind of chanting, inaudible singing, and a shady man in a Subway Series t-shirt in the background narrating everything she does. Fans are certainly taking notice.


“This is my third time seeing it. I find something different every time,” says avid theatre fan Andrew Schumer. “Though, come to think of it, maybe that’s because this time there was a full hour where she threatened Bloomberg with a shoe full of ants. But, Evita is, at its heart, a political story. Bravissimo!”


The Broadway Beat caught up with Mrs. Cabrera to discuss her preparation for the role, the unorthodox staging, and why now is the time to bring this bold vision to life.


“Pigeons! They’re everywhere!” she responded before lighting a second cigarette, even though there was already one in her mouth.


At press time, it was rumored that she’ll be opening a production of STOMP! after she was seen banging trash cans together from the hours of 2am - 5am.