by Mary Kelly. @marykellycomedy.
Burdened with the feeling that other actors are living out your dream, but still interested in seeing all the talent Broadway has to offer, at a discount? You've come to the right place!
1. Standing Room Only
Admit it: Standing instead of sitting helps you find a place to ground your acute “I-should-be-up-there-not-you” anxiety. Dig your heels into the story. No, I mean literally dig your heels in, you’ll be there for a while. 2. TKTS Booth Day-of tickets at a discount! You’ll see shows you were rejected for, but don’t get discouraged. Remember, there are no small parts! Well, aside from the tiny part in The Music Man they gave Brittney from your voice class. Good luck to her! I suggest using that hollow, bitter feeling you get from Brittney’s success as fuel to get you in the TKTS line bright and early. 3. Second Acting
While it had a heyday in the time of cigarettes and pay phones, many still swear by sneaking in at intermission. It’s challenging, but isn't it the challenge that makes you an actor? When the security guards ask you nicely to leave, that’s the time to really kick it up a notch.
4. Gather Intel on Brittney When you can’t think of her last name - check the playbill for her show. Of course, it’s the first page you flip to. Now do some digging and see what you find about Brittney’s stupid, amazing life. Her friends? Her parents? A viable address and the time she usually gets home? Silly little things like that.
5. Go to Brittney's House
On the big night, wear your best stage-crew black and sneak in. Midnight is best, but use your creative license. Walk past her awards and the diplomas - wait, did this bitch go to Carnegie Mellon? When you locate Brittney running lines, be gentle, you just want to scare her. You aren’t asking for much. An agent’s name? Who did her demo reel?
The least she could do is hand over a couple of comp tickets. You came all this way.