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  • Writer's pictureBroadway Beat

OPINION: One More Scotch and I’m Pretty Sure I Could Fight the Darkness of the Music of the Night

Updated: Apr 3, 2021

by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio.

OK, listen here, punk. I get what you’re saying - “open up your mind, let your fantasies unwind” and so on, that part’s fine. That part’s gravy. But you know what I gotta problem with? That whole “this darkness which you know you cannot fight” bit.

What you have to understand is that I’m about six knuckles of bourbon deep, and if you get one more in me, I’m actually pretty sure I could take that fucker in a bare-knuckle parking lot brawl. In fact, bring it on.

You might be thinking “calm down” and “it’s a metaphor”, but no, I hear that the darkness of the music of the night has been eyeballing me all night long, and I’m ready to see what’s what. Does he think he’s better than me? Huh? Do YOU think you’re better than me? Buy me one more drink cause I can't find my debit card, and find out.

The Phantom has two loves: music and Christine.

I, on the other hand, only have one: punching with my fists and also freakin’ partying and also my friend Luke, he’s a good dude. Don’t see him as much since the baby came around, but that’s cool, I still text him. He doesn’t text back, but I text him.

Yeah, the darkness of the music of the night is gonna be floating and falling alright - right after gettin’ socked by my sweet uppercut. Touch me? Trust me, I’ll silence your senses.

You think you can take me, darkness of the music? Ok, name the time and the place. It just can’t be Tuesday at 8:30 cause I have court.

So, in conclusion, I’ll take that sorry freeloader any time. Let your mind start a journey through a strange new world: the world of beat town.

Softly, deftly, music shall caress you. I just hope it has a medical degree.

Close your eyes and surrender to your darkest dreams? Purge your thoughts of the life you knew before? Close your eyes, let your spirit start to SOAR???

Fuck, that’s beautiful. I… I actually really needed that. Thank you. I… I’m sorry. No no, it’s OK, I’m just gonna head home. I… I’m sorry again, darkness of the music of the night. Maybe we can get coffee sometime, and just, talk?


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