"We'll Put On Our Own Show Then!" Declares Group of Friends Making Huge Financial, Emotional Mistake
by Danny Neary. @itsdannyneary.
BROOKLYN, NY - Upon hearing the news that Broadway and all New York area theaters will be closed through the end of 2020, a defiant group of theatrically minded friends declared that they would simply put on their own show - setting off a chain of financial and emotional mistakes that would mentally scar everyone involved, sources confirmed.
“Performers and artists like us have to perform, it's who we are,” said Meredith Goldman, the de-facto director of the show. “The show must go on. If we can’t audition for actual shows because of some BS CDC guidelines, then we will write, create, star in and suffer the consequences of our own show!”
Elizabeth Williams and Brayden Miller, the show’s two leads, were both thrilled to be included in a production that would eventually lead them both to quit acting and end their three year relationship. Williams, who, immediately after the show, will most likely embark on a year-long silence retreat, expressed her excitement about being able to not only act, but get to help out with the costume design.
“It’s incredible. You know, when a tragedy like this happens, you think you’re going to be sad all the time, with the deaths and all that, but I really have never been more excited,” noted Williams. “It’s like they say: as long as you love what you do and have access to your trust fund, you’ll never work a day in your life.”
Miller also expressed his excitement about not only being cast as one of the leads, but getting the chance to take on a larger role behind the scenes.
"Usually when I do a show I just act, but constraints breed creativity and I can't wait to take on a bigger role,” stated Miller. “We have to adapt, and make our own creative space. That's what artists do and that's why I'm so excited to not only be the lead actor but to also get to write all the lyrics to the rap battles and include some of my spoken word poetry."
Miller added that ever since he saw Hamilton he’d wanted to write his own raps, and that getting to share them with his friends, many of whom have now vowed to never see live theatre again, was a dream come true. At press time, Miller was aggressively applying to graduate school and seeking a refund from Backstage.