by Spencer Meade. @comeaday (Twitter), @spennyislennie (Instagram).
D.C. - The second act of a virtual production of the Olivier Award winning play King Charles III is reportedly dragging after the actor portraying the titular role started going off book.
“About half an hour after intermission, the character of King Charles started going off the rails more than usual,” said viewer Hazel Thompson. “He’s been adding long monologues that skip logical steps, throwing full-on temper tantrums, and tweeting conspiracy theories about how the monarchy is rigged against him.”
Before the show, Michael Brightman, the lead actor whose contract was not renewed by the show’s producers after he was labelled unfit for the role by critics, stated his intent to draw the show out as long as necessary until the producers give him a second run as the king.
“I will not accept the nation’s desire to hand over the monarchy to my corrupt son and daughter in law and will exercise every legal avenue I have until I am victorious,” he stated during an improvised monologue in what is surely to be his closing performance. “There will be no abdication. There will be only a continuation.”
The move also seems to have caught the cast and crew off guard, as there have been reported eyerolls by the King’s scene partners, actors talking over each other in an attempt to advance the plot, and stagehands sabotaging the set to get Brightman off the stage. The producers, however, are steadfast in their position.
“We have no evidence of Mr. Brightman’s claims that he’s earned a second chance as the lead in our show and until he produces such evidence, our minds remain unchanged,” proclaimed producer May Trent. “At some point, he’ll run out of steam and we’ll have a real ruler on the throne again.”
In an attempt to buy himself some time, Brightman has left the stage to golf at St Andrews. The cast hopes to finish the last 20 minutes of the script without him, but the actors portraying Kate and William have noted that they’ll end the show by 1:20am even if he returns.
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