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“New Year, New Me” says Actor Using the Same Audition Monologue Five Years in a Row

by Edward Precht. @pertoltprecht.

NEW YORK, NY - New Year’s Day. For many, it’s a time to reflect on the triumphs and disappointments of the previous year, and to create goals for what they wish to accomplish in the months ahead - which is exactly what a local actor has claimed to do on social media, as he does every year, despite regurgitating the same audition monologue he’s been using for half a decade, sources confirmed.


“New year, new me,” says actor and non-licensed yoga instructor Sammy Herris. “My resolution for 2020 is to audition more. And by ‘audition more,’ I mean do the same two monologues I’ve been using over and over and over again, but louder and with more frequency. Not a higher frequency, just more frequency.”


Other actors shared a similar air of refreshment and reinvigoration.


“My go-to’s are the little girl’s monologue from Arcadia and ‘Giants in the Sky’ from Into the Woods,” said Jackson Wittel, a 31-year old aspiring actor as he stood in the long, long line outside Ripley-Grier. “Am I child anymore? No. Did I use these pieces when I was 12 and auditioning for youth theater? You betcha. But this year, I’m doing them with a whole new attitude. New year, new moi,” he added while scratching at his pair of black leggings that, though he didn’t say it, had clearly been worn for every single one of his auditions for two decades.


The Broadway Beat caught up with local casting agent Matthew Heard for his thoughts on the actor’s not-so-fresh new perspective.


“This happens every year,” noted the agent while looking through a stack of “new” headshots each dated “Fall 2014”. “You can’t play the whole ‘fresh-faced talent’ angle if you’re just gonna recite some lines you memorized as an undergrad. Sometimes actors will just put on glasses for the audition if they’re not wearing glasses in their headshot - we see it all the time and whenever we bring it up, they just say ‘new year, new me’ and finish their piece from Our Town.”


At press time, we asked Herris if she felt she should update the material, to which she laughed in our faces.


“I didn’t come all the way to New York with a back pocket full of two monologues and a pair of black flats so worn down you can see my toes to... try something different. Besides, I have made a slight update. I’m wearing glasses today, when usually, I don’t wear glasses. New year, new me, baby!”