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Local Hero Alert! Theatre Company Doesn't Add Playwrights to Their Mailing List After Rejecting Them

by Catherine Weingarten. @sarahkaneissexy.

NEW YORK, NY - Imagination Station Theater Collective, a local independent theatre company, received a Theatre Hero award last night for their magnanimous act of not adding playwrights to their mailing list after rejecting them, proud sources confirmed.


“We are so honored to receive this award,” said Pamela Jeannine Berry, Imagination’s Literary Manager. “While we know all of our colleagues like adding playwrights to their mailing lists along with other harmful behavior like soliciting them for money or just generally negging them, we thought, ‘why not just treat them like professionals and let them join our mailing list if they want to?’ We had no idea that doing so was actually a very brave, very rare act of heroism.”


Caitlin Higenbeen, a local playwright who is known for her plays about teddy bears being sad, was overwhelmed with joy hearing that Imagination Station had been honored with this much deserved award.


“As a playwright, I’m used to getting on companies mailing lists for years after just getting rejected once by them,” noted Higenbeen. “This brave local company took a real stand and now I don’t have to hear everyday about their upcoming zoom puppet show, The Pandemic is Hard for Us All, Especially Mongooses, which I feel especially #grateful for.”


Donald Firtree, an artistic director of the rival Fountain Pen Theater Company, seemed less supportive of Imagination Station’s hero status.


“I don’t see what’s so wrong with adding playwrights to our mailing list after rejecting them,” noted Firtree. “I couldn’t think of anything more exciting than hearing about what each of our company members are baking during the pandemic and who has the cutest cat! Hint: I think it’s my hairless cat, Sprinkledoodle!!”


At press time, playwrights from around the world chipped in to host a full parade in honor of Imagination Station Theater Collective for actually caring about playwrights. Additionally, many local female playwrights have started throwing their bras at members of the Imagination Station staff as they were members of the Beatles.

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