by Vanessa Ullman.
December can only bring one of two things: Oscar bait movies to write down in your Notes app and ignore until March, and holiday greeting discourse.
This year, it’s time we try something new. A salutation that is just as inclusive as it is exclusive.
“And That’s What You Missed on Glee”
A phrase that addresses everyone and alienates those who missed a show that somehow once got 19 Emmy nominations? Take notes, season three of Smash!
And That’s What You Missed on Glee (or ATWYMOG) isn’t just some slogan. It reminds you of the ghost of Glee Christmas Past (Jane Lynch singing the Grinch song) and the ghost of Glee Christmas Future (Jane Lynch singing the Grinch song in Funny Girl).
You let people know that not everyone was watching Downton Abbey back then, and that’s okay. By saying ATWYMOG you’re saying “I see you, I hear you, and I’m also hearing Matthew Morrison sing a mashup of 'Singing in the Rain/Umbrella'.”
I know what you’re thinking. Isn’t it easier to say happy holidays and put on a Santa hat? Does anyone still care or even reference Glee now?
History, or FEUD: Lea and Beanie, will tell us that they do. People care about Glee. They love to hate it, and hate to hate it. They love tweeting “I’m SO glad Hamilton came out after Will Schuester could do 'Cabinet Battle #2'” in the year 2021, where that take is definitely still new. And if there’s one life lesson we learned from Glee, it’s, uh…
This holiday season, tell people “ And That’s What You Missed on Glee” Look at their confused faces. Look at their Freestyle Love Supreme playbills. Look in their deeply troubled souls when you repeat it again because they “don’t get it” and are “trying to wait in line for Moulin Rouge.”
And if that doesn't work, take a note from Glee’s recent exit from Netflix and leave the conversation.