AWOOOGA! This Year’s “Broadway Bares” Just Actors Baring Their Souls, Processing the Year, Crying
by Justin Ayer. @JustinAyer.
NEW YORK, NY - Broadway Bares, the long-running fundraiser known for its sexy stripteases, sweaty six packs, and sizzling hot performances, will reportedly look a bit different this year. Due to the current pandemic, now reaching it’s fifth month & counting, Broadway Bares will not only be virtual, but also very very vulnerable, zooming in on the performers soul instead of their bodies, sources confirmed.
“I got a call asking if I would like to talk to someone about the issues that performers are facing now that theatres are closed down,” said Broadway veteran and sexy, sexy man Terrence Romy. “I didn’t realize that the therapy sessions would be recorded and broadcast at this year’s Bares. I cry a lot in mine and don’t even take off my shirt, but I guess if that’s what people want.”
Even with the different format, the turnout for the virtual fundraiser is to be higher than ever before. Many other Broadway performers volunteered to be a part of this emotionally available event.
“I have a lot to get off my chest,” says sensual, sexy SIX songstress Isabella TiGretti. “This is my opportunity to tell the theatre world that I, Isabella TiGretti, am obsessed with opossums. I have three in my apartment. They are adorable and so good for the environment. Can’t wait to share with everyone oh and also give a sexy shimmy for the fans.”
26-year old Ohio resident Patrick Landers is not quite sure about this year’s event.
“I wanted to wank off to some oiled up chorus boys - not hear about someone’s issues, insecurities, and fear for the future, but hey, a kink is a kink I guess,” said Landers from his apartment above his parents garage. “Either way I have a packed night, dinner with the folks, Fortnite, Broadway Bares, and sliding into Nick Adams' DMs.”
At press time, event organizers are considering adding the opportunity for viewers to ask the performers questions during the broadcast, but only if they’re licensed social workers currently taking on new clients.
Broadway Bares was started in 1994 by the talented Jerry Mitchell. All proceeds will go to Broadway Cares/Equity Fights Aids. You can donate to Broadway Bares: Zoom In via the link below.